Dress: City Chic
Leggings: City Chic
Cardigan: City Chic
I’ve had a lot of difficult changes in my life over the last four months.
The most obvious is the catastrophic break-down of an eight year relationship – which has in turn led to an uncomfortable re-entry into the dating market and an ongoing search for a housemate. My parents have retired, which is traumatic enough, but they’ve also moved out of my childhood home (though I’m living in a haze of denial that will last until my next visit to Canberra). Two of my favourite workmates have left the company (sob!) and another dear friend has left to travel the world with new husband.
Coupled with other, more complicated changes that have occurred in recent weeks I’m finding myself longing for everything to go back to “normal”.
I’m not a big fan of change. I know there’s people out there who live for it, but I’m simply not one of them. I like my routine.
That said, I recognise that what people say about change being as good as a holiday is very true. Every big change that I’ve made in my life has been a good one and has resulted in me being much happier and better off than I was before, but it’s so hard. In my darker moments I even find myself missing the Fuckwit Ex, or rather the security of being in a (granted, one-sided) relationship.
Sorry, not a very light-hearted post today.
I’m fine, really – just having a rare retrospective day.
Ooohh, cute shoes. I know what you mean. I'm sure for most people the periods of time that we go through the most growth, the changes and adjustments that do benefit us the most are hardest.
It's really easy to remember only the good when things are hard and just want some comfort from the familiar. Despite how crap your ex may have been the fact with you were him for such a long time, it's easy to understand why you miss him from time to time.
Please be kind to yourself. It's harder to be that way with ourselves than others at times though.
Keep your head up. When life throws you lemons make lemonade. I'm sure you will find someone who appreciates you and all of your oh so cute outfits. Someone who looks as cute as you all the time should have no problem meeting that special someone. You should read a book written by Shay the date diva I found that it helped me a lot when I was going through a similiar situation. Heads Up
Aw, chicken. I'm sorry so much has changed in your life. While I can't compare quite to the drama of your changes, I agree on the routine front – having it disrupted so much on the work front made me pretty much useless for about two months there, and I'm only just beginning to feel normal…along with guilty and a few other emotions. Like you, I know it's for the better, but it's still just so hard sometimes to deal with so much all at once. I know you're a strong person who can deal with it, and better still, you look totally cute while doing it. That dress is divine, and you rock.
And yet you look adorable. 🙂
evolution cannot be possible without changes 😉 it's obvious that we are afraid of unknown and new but pffffff changes are the part of life and that's really good 😉
big biiiiiiiiig hug 🙂
(my pink sweater has been shipped 😛 that's a good change ;))
I too hate change. Well, big changes.
I know one thing for sure, you will get through it.
And boy oh boy, will you look fabulous doing it. x
retrospect is good lil. everyone should do it once in a while. i am LOVING the outfit – those shoes make it all pop and look so fantastic. i guess i have to go looking for a pair of teal shoes now!! chin up lovely lady, bigger and better things are coming your way!
Jaust take one day at a time, looking fabulous one outfit at a time.
Lots of positive energy being sent your way!!!
Yeah, but it's a clean slate for 2010, which is absolutely going to be your year. Get rid of all the deadwood, doubts and insecurities for 2009 and 2010 can be fresh, fresh, new and exciting and FUN. No compromising on your happiness. And you are way more than a cute outfit, you are a strong, super-super smart, creative lady, who just HAPPENS to also be beautiful.
I know what you mean- I DO NOT like change. At all. No way.
This may sound crazy, but leaving middle school was so hard for me! High school is still really different and I'm not sure I like it yet.
We love your work, lilli, and I agree with Georgie Love – how exciting is 2010 going to be?! You are so inspiring – thanks for sharing all your ups and downs with us. xo
Yes, it's so true. Change is hard. And confronting, and exhausting too.
But being stuck in a rut over a long period of time is so much worse and can be so much more detrimental.
This is just the end of the change cycle, where the old stuff is finally being washed away and the transit to the groovy, happy, fun and gorgeous new stuff begins. Hang in there darlingest, and have faith. The best really is yet to come.
And I love your outfit, by the way. You look as luscious as ever.
Aw, Lil, I hope you get some peace soon. You sound like you have had such a tough couple of months
I hope you know that the reason we all love this blog and adore you is because you represent the kind of women we all want to be. Frou frou on the outside, heart of gold ( white gold naturally) inside and just the right amount of toughness in-between. You can get through anything but I certainly hope you don't have to.
Change is evil.. but in the end so worth the pain it causes at the time.
You are gorgeous, look amazing and will be swept off your feet by someone amazing in time.
I know how hard it is, the quiet times …
Hang in there it will get better!!!
Lilli, One of my favourite people in the world uses the saying "fake it till you make it." Keep up these gorgeous ensembles, with your even more gorgeous face and you'll soon feel that this change was all for the best.
A "burryto" by the way is another one of those dodgy Mexican dishes from a shopping centre, that should have been buried, rather than served to some unsuspecting customer.
Those kinds of changes are major, but give yourself time. 8 years is a very long time and that's like going through a divorce. "Getting over it" doesn't happen immediately. Give yourself permission to grieve and feel sad, know however that this really is for the best. Such a long time without a commitment from a man who reaped the benefits of your love is not fair to you nor what you wanted (I gather). This is really a chance to reevaluate what you are doing with your life and what your new direction can be. It's a hard time, but can be a profitable one for you too. I hope it is.
I do empathise with you (as, I am sure, do many others) and all I can offer is for you to be kind to yourself. Indulge in whatever gives you joy, so long as it is not destructive, and allow yourself to feel the emotions as they bubble to the surface good or bad. One other piece of advice that I have come to believe in was given to me when I was in the depths of despair after my marriage broke down; it is that "you will get exactly what you need, just when you need it"
Maybe a "Holiday" is the answer!! You have been through alot..You are still grieving your past relationship which is normal. I dont know who called it off but even if it was you it takes ages to get through it..My advise is to get back into dating and maybe a holiday romance would be nice. Try meeting some new friends and set some short term goals for yourself. i.e. ask someone yourself on a fun date by say b4 xmas.You look awesome so you will have them lined up. Shout yourself a new perfume as soon as you can….Jacqui
I hate any kind of change, and obviously huge negative changes are horrifying. I wish I had something to tell you to make things better, but I don't except as we all know things DO get better with time.
I have never seen anyone look so stunning while going through bad things. I give you tons of credit–I would have probably dumped the camera and jumped in bed.
Keep on doing what you do, you are inspiring, and obviously a lot of people are thinking of you.
Hi, I love you look ; I come very offen on your blog to see how you !!!by by from France
hi, I come very offen on your blog to see your beautifull look of the day, always pretty!!
by by from France!